Thursday, April 15, 2010

It's Kinda Like When...

Behold, Razorclown Ministries.

It's a new blog where I'll post observations about life and faith, usually in a geeky vein. My latest post compares Christians and the Borg.

I'll be using ...delirium to occasionally post life updates and other stuff that doesn't fit elsewhere.

I'll keep posting fiction (at some point) on Paperangel Press.

Yup. I'm knee-deep in blogs. Now to actually update them.

Thursday, February 18, 2010


I've got this thing where I hate being wrong. Makes me feel very icky inside.

As I was journaling tonight, I found myself typing this:

Please shape my ministry, Lord. And increase my faith. Sort my thoughts and desires, and make sense of them. Show me, too, that I don't have to be right all the time. That I don't have to understand everything.

You want me to be humble. With my faults.

See, I take my own faults way too seriously. I can get pretty neurotic at times.

As I continued typing, I made a reference to this blog by its name: ...delerium. And when I did, I saw a little red squiggly line under the word. Spell check.

No freakin' way, I thought.

Sure enough. I, the spelling nazi, have had a giant misspelled word at the top of my blog for seven years.

And I laughed... and corrected it.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Pew, Pew, Pew

Read through 3 John this evening, then played some Modern Warfare 2 online. As the Scripture was settling in my mind, I saw that my brother-in-law was online. We joined up and promptly started shooting at each other.

He smoked me. Mercilessly.

I'd come tearing over a grassy hill and get dropped. Different hill each time. He was sitting across the level with a sniper rifle, no doubt yawning as he picked me off. Mind you, we were in a game with 16 other people, so I felt a little picked-on the fourth time he shot me in the head.

In the next round, we were on the same team. Didn't do too great that time, either. The opposing team had us pinned for most of the game, shutting us down with sniper fire on one side and a massed assault on the other.

Grr. Snipers.

Sometimes I get competitive. Sometimes I just get frustrated. When it feels like I'm getting trounced and my opponent is barely trying, I lean toward frustrated.

But as I was being riddled with bullets, I thought of 3 John. It mentions this guy, Diotrephes. He's causing trouble for the church, shutting good people out and causing all manner of division.

John says he "loves to be first."

I like winning, but I don't always have to. When I feel like I do, that's when a game - supposed to be fun, remember? - starts breeding anger. Pride left unchecked turns us against each other. Diotrephes reminded me of that.

Last round, I got 6 kills, and died 8 times.

Ah, well. Getcha next time, Dom.

Monday, January 18, 2010

In All Its Truth

One of my deepest fears is that, no matter what I do or how hard I try, my actions just won't be enough. I'm afraid of my own inadequacy.

Check this out:

We have heard of your... faith and love that spring from the hope that is stored up for you in heaven and that you have already heard about in the word of truth. -from Colossians 1:4-5

The Colossians' faith and love, Paul says, comes from their hope. But where does the hope come from?

All over the world this gospel is bearing fruit and growing, just as it has been doing among you since the day you heard it and understood God's grace in all its truth. -Colossians 1:6b

The truth of God's overwhelming grace has gotten to them. That's where they get their hope. And that hope manifests not just in emotion, but action. They bear fruit, and it looks like faith and love.

Paul goes on to describe the life he's praying that they'll experience. The life that God meant them to have. He talks about good works. Knowledge. Power. Endurance. Patience. Joy. Thankfulness. (see Colossians 1:10-12)

He leads off the list with the one that's hardest for me to believe: a life that pleases God.

There may always be parts of our lives that don't please God. But there are those that do. He loves when we get it right, and even when we try and fail. He loves us. He's proven that.

Oh, how He's proven that.

For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. -Colossians 1:13-14

May we all understand His grace. May it humble us and encourage us. May we seek to please Him, and thank Him that we can.